JetBlue May Give Free Alcohol, But US Airways Gave Free Coffee...

Here's the final installment of my 3-part miniseries about experiences traveling to/from NY-NC.

The one thing I always maintain when flying is that I won't relax until I'm actually on the ground in my destination.  This isn't a safety thing, it's an actual "LaGuardia is the worst airport in the history of the world except possibly JFK" thing.  I cannot even begin to count how many times I've been on a plane, taxiing towards the runway for an on-time departure, when there's been some sort of problem - 98.3% of the time from LGA's end - and I've been stuck sitting on runway or tarmac for a while.

This is what happened to me today.  7am flight.  Early in the morning.  Should be no problems.  Get to RDU this morning and successfully still have a ticket (yesterday's incident had not haunted me at 6am this morning, thankfully).  We board at a reasonable time and start taxiing towards the runway in order to take off at our scheduled time.  Then suddenly, we stop.

Pilot gets on the PA and goes, "Well, it seems that LGA is having ground delays, as usual.  We'll be delayed here as a result for around 20 minutes."  It's never a good sign when the 'fashion seat belts" light goes off.  We wait.  20 minutes later, we're told that we have to wait another 10 minutes to call us back and let us know what time we can be rescheduled to depart.  Naturally.  The flight attendant makes a hilarious comment at this point to us, remarking, "Gotta love NY.  There's always delays, even early in the morning."

During this 10 minutes, something interesting happens.  Now, I'm sitting in seat 1F, which is the window seat in the very first row on the right side of the plane.  This isn't the most ideal seat in the world but being that US Airways bumped me off this flight that I booked back at the very beginning of September because they didn't know that their own plane actually took off on Saturday, I had no option in my seating.  However, I would have missed what happened next had I not been sitting here.  The flight attendant gets a phone call, distinctly says, "I understand" and unbuckles her seat belt.  Then she gets up, opens the door to the airplane and lets the pilot out.

Yes, the pilot got out of the plane.

The man sitting next to me and I look at each other and go, "Well, that can't be good."  We can't see what he's doing on the left side of the plane, but then I see him go around to the wing on the right side of the plane.  He wipes the condensation off of it with his hand and then comes back on to the plane and tells the flight attendant, "We're good."  At this point, I'm wondering if "we're good" means "We're not going to crash if we ever do take off" or "We're actually going to get this plane in the air."

About a minute later, he tell us that we've got a departure time of 10 minutes.  Finally - but only 40 minutes late (and it's sad that one has to consider "only 40 minutes" a true blessing when flying) we take off.

To her credit, the flight attendant kinda rocked.  She reduced the price of water, soda, and juice to $1 from $2, alcohol from $7 to I believe $6, and gave us free coffee and Biscoff (yay! only thing I miss about Delta are those cookies man).  I was confused when she said that coffee and tea were free and she told me and the man next to me that "Since we waited 40 minutes on the runway, it's the least I could do.  Plus, ya'll probably could use some caffeine.  I know I could!"

So yeah, another trip to Raleigh in the car, another unnecessary airline drama over.  I had a great trip - the whole not stressing about having to work thing really worked out well haha - and I'll post more about that later or tomorrow morning.

Apparently US Airways Rewards You For Flying With Them By Canceling Reservations

I'm leaving to go to dinner and see a  movie with Jay in a few minutes, but here's a little update on my apparently not-dead airline curse.  If you missed my story yesterday, I had a bit of a problem getting to Raleigh from LaGuardia Airport because there was a "mechanical problem" that was apparently undetected until they decided to do a maintenance check of my plane as we were boarding.  We had to wait around, not knowing if we'd be able to leave NY or not, until they found us another plane to take us here.

Well, I go to check in for my 7am flight tomorrow morning around 11am this morning and there's a problem with my confirmation number.  My reservation apparently did not exist.  Upon calling customer service at US Airways, I was told that because I failed to make my flight out of New York, my tickets for my return flight were cancelled by US Airways.  First, she made it sound like I hadn't checked in on time for my flight there, which was bull because I checked in at 11:56am Friday for my 11:55am flight Saturday.  I explained to her exactly what happened to that flight and said I'd scan a picture of my boarding pass from LGA and email it to her as proof.  She put me on hold for several minutes.  When she finally came back, she had put me back on my flight back to NY.

Thank God it all worked out, but seriously, how ridiculous is that?  Like, are they going to have to find spots for all of us on that flight from yesterday because we all lost our return trip reservations or am I just the cursed one?  And how on EARTH did they make a mistake not knowing that one of their planes actually FLEW SOMEWHERE?!

I really cannot be late to work at 11am tomorrow morning, so think happy thoughts for me to NOT have any problems tomorrow morning!!

The Airplane Curse Continues: Why Our Country Is In a Depression and Other Assorted Rants & Realizations

And the curse continues.

I'm sitting here at LaGuardia, paying for Internet, because my flight is delayed indefinitely.  11:55am flight and it's a beautiful freaking day outside.  Today was supposed to be my non-stressful day where I didn't have to work at all for once until Monday morning and could finally have a non-work-filled weekend with Jay.  And it really did start in a relaxing manner.  Got up, watched "Grey's Anatomy" online (it was actually quite fabulous), had plenty of time to get ready and leave with 2 hours to spare.

Then I hit standstill traffic on the Cross Island Parkway and was delayed for over 30 minutes.  It finally cleared up and I went to the bagel store in Astoria that Jay loves and got a ton of bagels.  There was a long line, which I expected, so no surprises there.  I get to the airport finally and the parking lot is closed, of course.  I manage to get a pretty good spot in a different lot and run inside to security.  It's like 11:10am at this point.

Here's an actual somewhat humorous part:  The family traveling ahead of me on the security line managed to EACH set off the security metal detector AND all have to have their bags checked for having liquids that were too big, etc.  No, they were not black or Arab.  They were just plain ignorant dumbasses.  The girl was arguing over contact solution.  I felt like screaming at her, "Let it go!  Buy the travel size for a fucking dollar when you get to where you're going, bitch."

But moving on to the funny: The guy looks at me strangely after he checks out my bag.  I know exactly what's up and I go, "If you're wondering who would bring bagels on a plane, it's me."

He goes, "Yeah, I was actually.  Why?"  I explain that I'm bringing NY bagels to Raleigh, where they don't have good bagels and I promised to bring them down.  He started laughing a lot and let me go through.

So I get through security and into the terminal and I find that my gate has changed, but no one had told me this originally.  So I trek all the way back from Gate 7 to Gate 1 with my heavy bagel-filled bags.  It's 11:30am.  I see that we're not boarding yet and McDonalds is right near the gate, so I go get a fountain Diet Coke (who can resist fountain beverages, seriously) and get back to see boarding has begun.  I get in line and I see people coming back off the plane.  I inquire why and some gal tells me that it's because they said something was wrong.  The woman at the gate tells us that they've been informed by the crew that there's a "maintenance problem" and they have to wait for maintenance to come and look at it and then fix it.

The woman sitting next to me is an older version of me.  She immediately started bitching about how she's been here for 2 hours and is positive that the plane has been sitting here for at least that long, so why on Earth would they only decide to check it NOW, 20 minutes before take-off?  She's got a fabulous point.  And I'd bet my next plane ticket that they didn't check the plane earlier because they didn't want to do work before they absolutely had to.  Not to get controversial, but that's the fucking problem with this country today.  No one wants to do work, to work hard.  No wonder the economy is how it is.  There's a bunch of lazy assholes in this country.  I work 7 days a week and I have nothing to show for it, yet someone who doesn't work at all and has no drive or desire to can just open their hands.  After 9/11, people wanted things and they got it, regardless of whether or not they could pay for it and now we're all paying the price.  I'm talking about everyone, lest anybody think that I'm picking on the lower income people.  You invest your money in the stock market, it's still paper money.  You get caught spending money you don't have in the first place on second homes and what not and then whine about how life's not fair.  I see people who come into my job with worker's compensation injuries and some continually make excuses to not be able to go back to work.  God forbid you got into an elevator with crutches or had to limp from your desk to the bathroom.  God forbid you have to go back to working for a living.

You're either lazy or you're greedy.  Greed is the head of a Wall Street corporation who still takes his $500,000 bonus for the year regardless of all the jobs that have been lost because of how shitty you ran your company.  Greed is constantly taking, taking, taking and not putting back into society.  And I'd say that 90% of the people I know and am associated with are NOT like that.  So it's not all hopeless, but there's a large faction of people in this country that are like that and it's not fair to the rest of us who are losing money, jobs, etc.  And as I've bitched about before, we all treat each other like complete shit.  Even the ticket agents here are being nasty over the loudspeaker and I have not heard one person - myself included - who has confronted them in a nasty way (or at all) yet.

So at least this delay hasn't yet brought on a fit of crying and swearing yet  I've just decided to take it out on my fellow Americans.  The update since I began writing this post about 45 minutes ago is that they're going to try to change planes.  We have to wait for them to get another plane, then bring it to the gate, then have the crew change planes themselves, then prepare the cabin, then maybe get it checked out by maintenance to see if it's good to go, then we'll get our boarding time.  Joy.  I love spending my supposed-non-stressful-Saturdays waiting in airports for a problem that could have been detected hours ago to be solved now at the expense of everyone else.

Maybe I'll go update "The Plane Truth" while I wait.  Or go network and try to find someone who lives/works in Raleigh now to find me a job there so I can move and not have to ever wait around in airports twice a month again.

Delta Does It Again

As if the obvious wasn't enough, here's another reason why Delta is a mess of an airline. Last night, I received my weekly email with Delta's fares. Although I've publicly sworn off flying Delta many, many times, the promise of a $69 ticket each way was almost too much temptation to resist. (Back story: This afternoon, I was looking into possibly flying to Raleigh this weekend - I know it's not really practical at all, but let's face it; being back on LI makes me restless to go do things far away from LI.)

So anyway, here's a screen cap of the email, which was sent at 9:26pm on Monday, August 18:

Please note that it says, clear as day, that flights from JFK to RDU for travel this coming Saturday to next Monday or Tuesday are $69 each way.

So, I figure, "Hey, why not just check it out? Don't have to buy a ticket, just look..." Here is what happens when you follow the rules - magically, the trip is $339. I may consider myself more of a writer than an accountant, but this makes no sense. I try one more time, thinking perhaps I screwed up the dates or something. Still:

Upon further investigation on the website, I learn the following:

So...it's $129 each way to/from RDU from either JFK or LGA? That's significantly different from $69 each way. And if the site just wasn't updated as of me writing this (it's almost 1am early Tuesday morning/late Monday night), then why even send out an email if the website isn't updated?

Nice job, Delta. Nice job.

California Dreamin'

I had the craziest dream last night and I have no idea what it means at all, though I should probably just take it as it is:

I was returning home to New York (JFK airport for some strange reason; I usually fly out of LGA) from what I think was Raleigh (minor detail I forgot after waking up). I had a flight that left early in the morning and the last time I looked at my watch in my dream was 6:45am. I fell asleep. I woke up and I was on a JetBlue flight (which I guess is why I was supposed to be at JFK, since it doesn't fly to LGA), but it was strangely quiet. Everyone seemed to be waiting for something. I was in the front and like, "Eff this! Let's get off this pliz-zane!" I looked at my watch and saw that it said 9pm, but thought not much of it, thinking that maybe it was 9am & my watch was just spazzing. I left the plane. It was sorta set up like the "Soarin' Over California" ride at Disneyland - very wide.

I walked off and into the airport and immediately got confused. It wasn't JFK. I kept walking, this time a little more, "Ummm WTF?!" Then I see a huge sign on the wall: "Welcome to Los Angeles International Airport."

Naturally, I'm a little bit panicked to find out that I have not landed in New York, but LAX in California.

So I run back to the plane and am magically not stopped by security or anyone and I go back to my seat, as they're in the middle of announcing that we were unable to land at John F. Kennedy Airport and had to fly to LAX instead. (As Jay pointed out when I told him this morning, "So...they couldn't land in NY, so they...flew to California?")

As one can only do in dreamland, I find a free customer service representative as soon as I get into the terminal, who looks and sounds suspiciously like my Aunt Carol, who I only see like 4 times a year. I explain to her that I'm part of the NY JetBlue flight and I needed to get home. She took me to this back door - almost secret entrance - to a ticket counter that also doubled as a line at a grocery store. Yes, it was still set up in LAX. I explained to him the situation - realize that it's actually only 6pm since it was PDT time - and he looks up my next flight options back to NY.

At this point in my dream, I'm magically also on the phone with Jay, explaining what's happening to him. It was the same situation as when I returned from Comic Con; a Wednesday and I technically didn't have anything to do until the following Monday. So I suggest to the ticket agent/grocery store clerk that I can wait til the following morning to get a flight out (hey, when in Rome Los Angeles...). Jay and the Aunt Carol look/soundalike try to shush me up, but I insist the whole time, "It's fine. I don't have anything to do the rest of this week and Jana lives in Burbank, she can maybe come pick me up! I've never seen LA!" Jay keeps insisting he'll call his Aunt Cindy or some other relative he has in LA or even Ralph & Stevi while the Aunt Carol look/soundalike is hushing me up, like I'm an idiot for not wanting to rush back to NY on a red-eye flight.

The man tells me there's a flight leaving very soon or else there's another one at 11am the next morning. I'm all about calling Jana in Burbank to show me LA/introduce me to David Duchovny ((sigh)), but just as I'm about to find out what flight I am taking, I woke up.

So, what does it mean?

The Curse Even Affects Fake Flights

So last week, on Monday July 29, Jay & I went to Disneyland in Anaheim, California to celebrate our one year anniversary. The whole day was awesome. My first trip to Disneyland totally rocked :) I cannot wait to go back. I'm in love with just about every ride we went on, most particularly The Hollywood Hotel of Terror, Space Mountain, the Indiana Jones ride, Splash Mountain, and Soarin' Over California.

Speaking of Soarin' Over California, it's a simulated flight that takes passengers up into the air and over the landscapes of California. I kept joking to Jay to beware, because me + flying = you never know. So we got our Fast Pass for it and as we're waiting on in line, we're laughing back & forth about our upcoming "plane" ride. We get inside and sit down on the left hand side on the ride, and buckle our seat belts when we hear a male attendant say to the female attendant, "This ride malfunctioned at the end of the last trip, so these people have to get up." So they make everyone that was sitting on the left of the ride unbuckle their seat belts and wait til the "next flight"!! Jay just kept looking at me and repeating, "You've got to be kidding me, you've got to be kidding me. You actually delayed us from getting on this plane ride and it's not even real!"

Yup, you can't make this stuff up kids. I'm cursed!

Also, I forgot to mention in my mammoth previous post, at least I was not on this flight: http://www.usatoday.com/travel/flights/2008-07-28-delta-jfk-delay_N.htm

And Trent from Pink Is the New Blog had a bit of a problem too: http://pinkisthenewblog.com/home/london-calling-take-two/

Typical Delta.

At Least JetBlue Gave Me Free Liquor

Because I know everyone loves a good airline story from yours truly - and I've got lot so 'em - here's what happened to me Tuesday, July 22 as I attempted to leave for San Diego, California on a 6:40pm direct flight from JFK Airport in NYC. I was flying JetBlue.

Let's preface this by saying that the weather forecast for July 17-22 was rain. July 17, 18, 19, 20, & 21 came and went without rain at all. In fact, it was quite humid and sunny all week. So naturally, the one day that I need to fly out somewhere, it's going to rain.

So I'm already freaking out that morning when it starts to rain. It stops, I hear it's supposed to pass early. Still way worried and being totally neurotic (more so than usual) the entire day because I know that something is going to happen, because something ALWAYS happens to me when I fly. On the way to JFK, my mom finally actually snaps at me me to shut up because she's had enough. But I know what's what, so whatev.

I arrive at JFK at 5pm for my 6:40pm flight, so I'm already early. Go through security with my first ever problem - my watch set off the metal detector, which is strange since I always have it on and it's never been a problem before. I'm assuming this means that either 1) JetBlue's sensors are very sensitive or 2) Delta's metal detectors are just for show. I'm going to assume option 2. A security guard was kinda a douche to me, but it was the end of the day & I was too nervous at what could possibly go wrong, so I didn't take offense.

I get through security and I've still got a full hour before takeoff, so I get a beer and bust out my broken laptop and my turkey sandwich & try to relax. So far, everything is on time except for the flights to Raleigh-Durham, actually. Ah, irony. This man approaches me and asks if I'll do him a favor and watch his 3 & 6-year old daughters while he goes to buy water and crap. I know I don't look dangerous or anything, but I was a stranger and I did have an alcoholic beverage in my hand. But he was from the Northwest, so maybe they're more trusting out there or something. They begin to board my plane EARLY. Yes, EARLY! Daddy Northwest isn't back yet, so I start to get a little nervous after the 3rd boarding call about 8 minutes after the first. I pack the girls up to go look for their dad, but he comes back at last. So I run over to my gate and we're boarded early for an early departure.

They tell us to turn off our cell phones/portable electronic devices and play the video on what to do should we encounter a problem in-air, blah blah blah. I say my goodbyes to my parents, to Jay, Jana, etc., letting them all know that I'm on my way and it's early! This was around 6:30ish. I fall asleep and wake up at 7:20pm because an announcement is being made. I look outside (no matter what, I'm still little kid enough to always want a window seat) and we're still at the gate. The announcement says that we're going to be indefinitely delayed here, so we can feel free to use the restroom or turn on our cell phones again. As soon as this is said, it starts pouring outside. Naturally, I burst into tears. I call my parents, Jay & Jana and all three of them answer with the EXACT phrase, "Why are you calling me?" All I'm thinking/self-pitying/crying is, "Why is this happening to me AGAIN?! THIS ISN'T EVEN DELTA!!!" So I'm pretty much a mess at that point. My parents are spouting this annoying, "It's all in your positive attitude, that's what will stop the delay - positive thoughts!" bullshit that makes me hang up on them. Jay & everyone on his end (Jack, Rob & Bev) are cracking jokes that's I'm NOT in the mood to joke about yet, but at least Jana, James, & John were sympathetic. It was awful. I was convinced beyond doubt that the flight was going to get canceled anyway because that's my luck. Though we've driven towards the runway, the pilot tells us that he's turning the plane off since all departures are closed & only planes that are low on fuel can arrive.

Finally, after an hour of waiting (so 2 hours after we were supposed to leave), the rain clears out and we start to move again. No announcements were made yet, but at least we're doing something. James is keeping me informed through a JFK radio tower feed on what's going on throughout this entire delay, so at least I've got some idea of what's up. About 15 minutes go by and then we stop again. Pilot gets on the P.A. and goes, "Well folks, we're #8 in line for take off, but it seems that a plane has landed on the departure runway and has malfunctioned. We don't know how long it will take someone to take it off the runway, but until then, all departures have been shut down again."

Not gonna lie, I started freaking out again. My phone was dying, so I couldn't text or use it for calls as much. After a teary phone call to Jay about how now I'm going to have to go through this alooooooone (insert breaking voice & sobs), my phone dies. I continue to feel sorry for myself. I don't even have any shame at this point, because I hate my flying experiences this much.

I actually like flying. Contrary to popular beliefs, I don't hate airports at all. I hate airlines themselves and I particularly hate the lack of respect given to customers and the terrible customer service. Before I go on, I just wanted to clear that up.

My phone died around 9:20pm. We were only delayed this second time by an additional 45 minutes, so "luckily" we took off at 9:30pm. Because at this point, we had been delayed almost 3 hours, word was that we were going to soon have an issue with fuel. We saved a little in that hour that we shut the plane off, at least. Which leads me to a question: Why don't more planes do that? If you're going to blame your dying industry on fuel costs & not your complete lack of respect for your customers, why aren't more planes shut off to avoid wasting gas? ANYWAYS, we ended up making a 5:45 minute flight in just five hours (our pilot was BOOKING) and I stared at the the JetBlue personal TV screen the entire time - keeping it on the channel that shows you where you are flying over. Obsessive? Yes. But it made me feel more like I had some sort of control.

However, there was one great thing about the flight. Our flight attendants were awesome. They were all under age 30 and I got not 1, not 2, but THREE free little Vodka shooters with some tonic. Let me tell you, that's one way to calm down after a stressful evening. Also put me to sleep for a good hour and a half. I can't blame JetBlue for this issue at all. I slightly blame JFK for not being better organized - taking 45 minutes to get a plane off a runway? No one even went out there for the first like 25 minutes. I was on the opposite side of the plane, but those who were on the other side could see what was going on. Mainly, I just blame my terrible, terrible luck.

But at least JetBlue gave me $15 worth of free liquor.

The Real Reason the Airline Industry is Dying

On my way to and from Raleigh this past weekend, I had yet another round of airport HELL. Since last April, I have been on an airplane almost every month. April, June, July, August, September, October, November, January - skipped February & March by driving in order to AVOID flying - May, and June. Starting with Katie's wedding on August 4, and every subsequent time (with the exception on one trip), I have had a problem. Hell, even on the months I didn't fly - December, end of May - there were problems. Jay's flight on December 27 was canceled and when we tried using JetBlue in May, it was also delayed 2 hours. And this past weekend, particularly Friday evening, as my flight was delayed 2 hours, then canceled, then re-instated 20 minutes later for the original 2-hour delay time, then pushed back, then moved up to an even earlier time, then delayed 3 MORE times after that. And they canceled like 6 other flights that day that weren't re-instated. Then we had a flight attendant who told us that (paraphrasing) "Yeah, who knows what the delay was? Could have been weather [that's what they told us at the airport as we looked out at the bright, sunny sky], could have been something else. Who knows really? You guys are lucky you're flying today."

Lucky. To get a service we paid for to actually deliver? And that woman sounded bitter to be working. Well, we were all bitter to be jerked around and inconvenienced. We weren't getting paid to be there, either.

See here's my opinion on the whole airline industry going out of business:

Everyone is saying that it's gas prices. They're raising fuel prices, tickets cost more, less people flying, forcing airlines to charge to check your bags, etc.

Well guess what? Gas prices are up and people are still driving places that they have to drive to. Maybe they curtail some trips or carpool but they're STILL driving, there's still a TON of rush hour traffic. People who have to fly places, be it for business trips or to see their significant others - we're STILL gonna fly, even if it's expensive. Cause if not, we'll just drive and that's just as expensive.

The problem, as I see it, is the airline service and lack of reliability that your plane's going to take off on time. When you leave LGA, it's a "suggested leaving time" - if it leaves at all. And anywhere else, at least from my experience & I know it's happened to Jay several times too, you're lucky to leave within the same hour. SO many people missed their connecting flights this morning and this week is a HUGE vacation traveling week. To get mistreated by the staff who are there to help you, to be told you're "lucky" a service that you paid a lot of money for is actually happening (albeit 3 hours later than you paid for it) - yeah, that's a slap in the face. The airline industry is going out of business because they're unreliable, they treat their customers like utter sh*t, and they're just poorly run businesses. Paying a lot of money is one thing, but that's how EVERYTHING is right now in this economy. But why should you pay that much money when you're just barely getting what you're paying for. If you even get it at all.

The people in charge don't give a crap at all. They don't care enough to impose policies that show their customers they care or to enforce any type of Passengers' Bill of Rights. Rather than good customer service, you get made to feel like you should be thanking them for doing THEIR job, because it's a "privilege." Well, lower the airline prices to $100 round trips and then we'll suck it up and get what we paid for.

The gov't gives so much money to the airline industry; they can't offer incentives to hire more people, so at least the staffing problems are fixed? So Christmas-time isn't ruined when a crew refuses to fly because they've gone over their flying hours for the month? Maybe we could actually fix something in this country for once. And btw, not being able to bring a water bottle past security is also a scam. Who wants to pay $3.75 for an 8-ounce bottle of really cheap water? Could a terrorist also just buy a bottle of water and go to the bathroom and put in whatever substance they want to use to blow up a plane?

I just hope Southwest starts to offer more flights out of different airports and that they're direct, since as far as I've seen, it's REALLY rare to find a direct flight from Southwest to anywhere that's not Baltimore or Philly and there's only like 4 flights out a day. Then again, Islip is a really small airport on LI, so that could be why there's not many choices.Everything but Southwest is going to go out of business soon, starting with Delta. And I say good riddance.