Ramblings of a Long Island Girl.

Satirical. Inappropriate. Sometimes crude. Bitchy. Rambling. You know how I do.

Sunday, February 01, 2009

And awaaaay we go!

In honor of the month of February, Ramblings of a Long Island Girl is moving to a brand new website, which can be found at www.collwrites.com.

Again, thank you Alice for all of your help. And thank you Jay for bugging me for the last month to actually do it.


Saturday, January 31, 2009

"The key to success is often the ability to adapt."

Brace yourselves. This is the last post you'll see on this blog. I'm going corporate. Well sort of. Within the next day or so, I'll be pimping out a brand new website version of Ramblings of a Long Island Girl. Yay!

Much, much, much, much, much, much thanks to the fabulous Alice (aka Aliceness on Twitter) for helping me set it all up and not killing me when I had 29 million questions about what the hell she was talking about (I'm not stupid, but I swear I can't grasp the concept of hosting still...)

But anyways, stay tuned within the next few days while stuff gets figured out. And then stay tuned within the next few weeks because I've got some other new stuff I'm working on too. Lots of change: new state to live in, new personal website, have to find a new job, who knows what else is in store? haha, the possibilities are endless but hopefully all good things.

Oh P.S. Jay & I watched The X-Files: I Want to Believe last night. I've heard lots of people just trash talk it or give generally negative reviews on it & I have to weigh in. I agree with Jana's opinion: it would have been way better as a TV movie rather than a motion picture. The supernatural element was weak & the plot wasn't strong enough to carry a movie. I loved having all the characters back (Yaaaaaay Skinner!), but it reminded me of a stronger episode of Fringe & a weaker (not weakest) episode of The X-Files. Also, isn't pedophile priests soooo 2006?

I'm off to do errands & see Michael Ian Black with my Pookie in NYC tonight. I'll leave you with Strider to say peace out to this blog:

Do not brood over your past mistakes and failures as this will only fill your mind with grief, regret and depression. Do not repeat them in the future. -Swami Sivananda

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Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Blogging Like Bored People Blog

Okay so we're having dismal snowy/rainy weather on Long Island today. My first-half of the day counterpart didn't come in today and the weather was all snow this morning, so there were a decent amount of cancellations. Basically, I've got not a lot to do & I'm bored so I'm doing what bored people do: blogging. I used to like having time to kill at work but the last 6 months has put me out of practice haha. So let's see what I can entertain myself by yakking about.
  1. New Lost tonight. I may or may not have seen it already. Go ahead, hate on me. I wouldn't go back & unwatch it for anything. I've had to stop discussing the show with my fellow geeks since I'm afraid of giving something away because there were (IMO) a lot of puzzle pieces that start to fit together more and I don't want to disprove something someone says by going, "Well, that can't be because..." And if you think that Jay & I talk about Lost because of the podcast, guess again. 85% of the time, we only talk about it if we're surrounded by friends who bring it up.
  2. Moving date approaches. I'm nervous but I've got a lot of fun things going on the next 2 weekends. I'm going to see Michael Ian Black do stand-up comedy in NYC with Pookie this Saturday night, January 31. She asked me if I wanted to go see it at 8pm or 10:30pm & my first thought was, "Why on EARTH would we go at 10:30pm? That's so late." Which then prompts me to think, "25? Fuck, I'm old."
  3. The following weekend is my "last weekend" in NY. The weekend of my 25th birthday. Annie is throwing together a Birthday/Going-Away Soiree with the BTR crew on Fri, Feb. 6. It's going to be good times. Well, duh. Cause with Annie's cupcakes, how could it not be good times? Also, I'm having a gathering in Herald's Square on Feb. 7. I don't care if the bar is a controversial choice. It's close to Penn Station, where I'm probably coming from & it's still cold in NYC. Therefore, that's where I'm having it. It's for Ian-face's birthday too (naturally). Good times will ensue as well.
  4. Fun Fact: My & Ian-face's 25th birthday coincides with the 2nd anniversary of Anna Nicole Smith's death.
  5. I'd really like to go to New York Comic Con again this year (Feb. 6-8), but the only day that I could make it is Saturday. This isn't a problem except that the freaking cast of my new favorite show Chuck is going to be there on Sunday! Also, the casts of Fringe & Joss Whedon's new show are going to be there Sunday as well. Yeah, I'm a geek. Stupid birthday.
  6. If you haven't already heard already, Scarlett Johansson is doing a cover of my boy Jeff Buckley's "Last Goodbye." I'm going to defer all discussion on this to Amanda.
  7. And finally, I'm thinking about making this blog into an actual website or at least updating the format/template a little bit. But more about that another time, I suppose.

Okay, I think I've successfully killed a little bit of time. I've actually written this blog twice because it didn't save the first time when I went to publish it and then it was gone. I was way wittier the first time, but oh well. At least it's 6pm now. May 7pm come fast & may 9pm come even faster. That's what she said.

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Thursday, January 22, 2009

Doesn't She Mean Fist Bumping?

This is priceless:

How does she even know that about Barack and Michelle anyway? Journalists nowadays will stop at nothing to get a good story, I guess! (Note to self...)


Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Is Faraday's Mom the Ring Lady?!

Dear Lost,

Thank you for still being awesome.



Monday, January 19, 2009

Colleen Vs. the Tuna Can, Round 2

Who will win THIS time?

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Sunday, January 18, 2009

The Taconic Tales or "Things That Could Only Happen to Me"

Alright, so this one is for you, Grandpa, the one who just laughed at me at 2:45am after I barged into your house & woke you up with tales of things that could only happen to me and who just shrugged and said, "Write it down."

So last night (Saturday), I had to travel up to Poughkeepsie for Sara & TJ's engagement meet-up at Mahoney's. I left in a good mood after an enjoyable recording of MetroBuzz. Although I was weary of making the trip up and back within the same night (I'm dog sitting again for my aunt), I was still really excited. So there I am, on the Taconic Parkway still near the Bronx/Westchester border, but on the Westchester side. Suddenly, I'm half-blind. My contact is no longer in my eye! I have really bad eye sight. Like, I'm a barely contact prescription away from legally blind. So this is not good. I find a spot to pull over. There's no shoulder on that part of the Taconic, so I pull over in the triangle shaped area between the parkway & an exit ramp. I've found my contact on my scarf, but it must have fallen out because my eyes were dry because it was rolled up and I couldn't unroll with. I tried, but it would have ripped.

I was too far along my way to turn around but not close enough to Poughkeepsie to justify driving further. I would have had to drive with one eye closed the rest of the way in the dark and then the 2.5 hours home much, much later that night. I ended up pouring water from a re-filled water bottle onto it to try to moisturize it so I could try to put it in my eye. I got it to resume regular contact lense shape, but my elbow hit my water bottle (I was too blind & anxious to get my contact into my eye that I had not put the cap back on it) and naturally, it spills directly on my iPod. Fabulous! It wasn't working on the way there, but it must have dried out while I was at the bar because thankfully, it was working again (knock on wood) for my drive home.

Sara & TJ's party was awesome. I had a kick ass time. So I was in a great mood again at 12:45am when I left to embark on my 2.5 hour drive back to my aunt's house, where I am dog sitting again this weekend. Well, my cell phone was dying. It was dying when I got to the party, but I had taken it into the bathroom with me and charged it for a few minutes here and there while I was at the party, just to buy me a little time on the way home with a working phone. I also needed gas, but was hoping that I'd have enough to make it to Queens or Long Island before having to stop. About 30 minutes into my drive, the gas light goes on (damn driving to Riverhead for work with all the stop & go traffic every day). The stretch of the Taconic I was on was unfortunately where the exits led to other highways or across the Hudson River or into Connecticut or whatever.

10 miles pass since the light goes on, it's almost 1:30am & I turn my phone on to call my dad to see if he knows anything in the area. He doesn't. I get off at the next exit, but there's nothing. Like, nothing. I keep driving & see a guy at a stop light. I flash my brights at him several times & wave my arms out the window. He directs me to "Go straight, bear left when you get to a stop sign & you'll run into a Mobile station." I head off in the direction he says, call my dad back and go, "I have no idea where I am or where this gas station is, but if you don't hear from me again soon, it's because my phone is dead & I may run out of gas so you may have to call the auto club or something. I'm by a Children's Hospital called---" Yup - that's when my phone died for good.

I found the gas station & started on my way back. Found the parkway really quickly but I'm still really friggin exhausted at this point because, well, it's late. Naturally, I'm not paying attention quickly enough and I end up going NORTH towards Albany instead of south towards New York City. The exits aren't close between (I love how Rt. 95 once you get into Delaware has it's exits corresponding with miles), so I drive a few more minutes to the Pleasantville exit and turn around to go south. Can we all guess what happens next? If you answered, "You missed the correct exit ramp & ended up accidentially traveling on the service road next to the parkway which then started to lead away from the parkway but were luckily blindly following a State Trooper who turns out was heading towards a different parkway that connected with the parkway you needed" then you guessed correctly!

So now I'm finally back on the Taconic Parkway going south. No cell phone & a half hour behind schedule. It's around 2am at this point and I'm still about 2 hours from home. My parents have no idea what's happening to me & I'm exhausted. I sped back to the Throgs Neck Bridge as quickly as I would dare to (with my luck or my level of tired, I wasn't going to push it). I made a beeline for my grandparents' house to try to use their telephone to call my parents & Jay to tell them I was okay. I should note that I was somewhat afraid that my uncle would wake up to the sound of someone coming into the house at 2:45am & come downstairs with his gun drawn on me (he's a cop). But I figured I'd take my chances and I had to pee anyway so whatever.

So that's basically where this story ends. My grandpa woke up while I was on the phone with my parents. I explained to him everything that had happened to me the entire night whining, "Why does this stuff always happen to ME? Who has a problem on the way there AND the way back?!" He just laughed at me and shook his head and said, "Write it all down." And that's what I did! My grandpa is so cool. I ended up getting back around 3:50am. I went to bed somewhere around 4:30 by the time I let the dog out and got changed and woke Jay & my parents up to tell them I finally made it home. A lovely little story about there and back again.

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